A Total Recall Halloween

Instead of asking people their favorite movie, a friend of mine always asks them what movie they actually have seen the most times. It's the movie you watch not because it's impressive, but because you're compelled to watch it any time the opportunity comes up, and it holds a special place in your heart. It reveals more about a person than the official "favorite movie" ever could.

Mine is Total Recall.

You remember it, right? With Arnold Schwarzenegger as the everyday guy who gets caught up in a spy plot on Mars, only to find out that (SPOILER ALERT) he has been a spy the whole time?!?

Haven't seen it? All you really need to know for this, besides the fact that you should go get Total Recall ASAP, is that there's one scene that no one ever forgets.

See, the part of Mars where the riffraff live has inadequate radiation shielding, so they all become mutants (Not from lack of oxygen as I previously had thought. Thank you, Andy, for the helpful correction. I'm so ashamed.) So Douglas Quaid (that's Schwarzenegger) goes there to look for a contact who is a prostitute. He is sidetracked by another prostitute-- her name is Mary-- who tries to tempt him by flashing her goods. Okay, now I'm giving you a scrolldown warning, because this is somewhat NSFW. Not real, but definitely vulgar.
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"Baby, you make me wish I had three hands!"
-Actual quote from movie

So obviously I wanted to be her for Halloween. I made the triple breasts out of papier mache that I formed over balloons. The rest of the costume was pretty fucking good, but I lost the high res pictures with the full body shots. But I do have a camera phone picture that I took on the subway on the way home. That night I got stopped by one cop who thought they were real, and by several gross dudes who asked how many vaginas I had. (The only answer that made them leave me alone: "ZERO.")